RYS 200, RYS 300 - Yoga Alliance, USA
Between the hills and valleys of our lives there are moments of indifference. When our dreams have been shattered, our hearts have been broken and we have not yet gathered the strength to start climbing the next hill, build another dream or heal our heart. The pause between inhalation and exhalation, a state of no-mind where there are no words for neither asking questions or giving answers; only silence remains. There, we can merely witness our thoughts and emotions without being them. We become the indifferent witnesses of our own lives and from that point, real life has the potential to begin.
We are raised to dream, taught to dream, encouraged to dream… but I have grown to understand that it is only the Wizard of Life or the Magician of the Mind, pulling his cunning tricks on us. Luring us away from the emptiness necessary to experience life. We need to be empty, we need to be nothingness… only that way the divine can enter us. Otherwise all seats are taken! How do we know it's an illusion? That it’s just a trick? Because at the end of most dreams there's no satisfaction... the pot of gold promised at the end of the rainbow is nowhere to be found and the sensation of disappointment is passing over us like a cloud of rain. Discomfort and insecurity follows. But instead of accepting this, we quickly weave a new dream and again we feel good, the pot of gold will appear at the end of the next rainbow - we’re certain of it!
How can a real life begin from the absence of dreams, from indifference, from nothingness one may ask?
I have always been a dreamer, holding my dreams to be sacred and always more important than reality. In dreams there’s boldness, creativity, adventure, joy… right? But the past year I have realized that dreams are deceitful friends who keep life out. Because dreams are products of the mind and the mind dies in the present moment. The mind only has power in the past or in the future, but when we are truly present, the mind cannot exist. Like all things, the mind wants to live… it doesn’t like being unemployed, because it is ambitious. The state of no mind is a disaster for the mind and it does all it can to prevent it, by kicking you back and forth like a football from past to future, rarely stopping at the present.
Myself, I have enjoyed life to the fullest when I have had no dream, as pleasant as the dream may have been. At times when I have been indifferent, when I almost haven’t cared about living then I have become the void and life has poured into me. When we have dreams, we are in fear. We pamper and protect our dream and do all we can to sustain the illusion. When we drop our dreams and ideas about how life should be and remain in the present moment, then life happens to us. We don’t have to seek out life through fulfilling our dreams, we just have to get out of our own way, become empty and let Life enter us.