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As I write, it is early in the morning and the cool winter wind is making the door to the corridor at my guest house slam, again and again. High up on the surrounding mountains, fires are burning in the fading darkness of the night and once again light has won the duel with darkness. On my bedside table stands a metal cup with a flower that I picked yesterday, in the place that I have proclaimed to be my natural sanctuary here in Rishikesh. It was a place which I found by chance one day and I immediately knew that it was the place where the Gods would be most likely to hear my prayers, and indeed they have – every time.

 

The flower I humbly asked to take home with me is a tough one. Its petals are a seductively pinkish red, but the branch it springs from is covered with sharp thorns. That means it’s not a flower to just pull up from the soil and take with you. If you do, you will cut yourself on the thorns and bleed. But if you let your fingertips touch the thorns and hold the branch gently, you can cut it off without getting hurt.

 

This flower, is in this moment in time, representing for me something I would like to call spiritduality. Everything in nature is made up of sharp thorns and soft petals. Every person is made up of light and shadow and duality is what makes creation possible. When people talk about their soulmate, they tend to have a very romantic idea of what their soulmate should be; it should be someone who understands you completely, whose mind you can read at all times and who is basically another version of you. You spend life in a constant state of blissful understanding, feeding each other grapes and making love all the time.

 

No… I believe in the opposite; that it is not he who is like me, but he who is unlike me. He who I share a deep sense of belonging with, but who irritates me the most, provokes me beyond reason and pushes me into facing my own shadows and limitations – because that is where growth happens; in spiritduality, in the battle between light and darkness inside our spirit. In the moment when when we are brutally pushed out of our comfort zone to learn something new and gain a deeper understanding. The person who by sacred contract has agreed to sign on as our soulmate and sometimes even antagonist, is our best friend and true lover, doing us the greatest spiritual favor when the spotlight suddenly is turned towards the darker corners of our soul.

 

Because love is not to show up with an emotional band-aid kit like some Florence Nightingale, patching up a bruised ego. True love is to love someone enough to allow them to suffer if that is what they need to do, to grow from caterpillar to butterfly. Holding his/her hand through a transformational process and silently let the lights and shadows in your soulmate create new patterns, more intriguing than before.

 

Jenny Wickman
Naturopath & Yoga Teacher

 

 

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Tags: jenergy, rishikesh, spirituality

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